Because blogging is a lot cheaper than therapy...

Remember the 2005 movie Fever Pitch, featuring the love story of Lindsey (Drew Barrymore) and Ben (Jimmy Fallon), a pair of star-crossed lovers in fair Boston, where the star-crossing is done by the Boston Red Sox?

I married Ben. Except my Ben, whose name is really Mike, is star-crossed by the Red Sox, the Patriots, the Celtics, the Bruins, and anything else (even obscure sports that have nothing whatsoever to do with Boston) that gets featured on SportsCenter.

Before I married Mike, I couldn’t have told you what SportsCenter was (it's a highlights show that airs up to twelve—yes, twelve—times a day on ESPN).

I’m tired of being shut out of something that’s so important to him and he’s tired of my excessive sighing and loud housecleaning during various telecasts. So I’ve agreed to submit to “re-education,” if he’ll let me snark about it on a blog.

This is my dramatic run across the outfield grass at Fenway, folks.